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My Partner Isn't Getting Wet

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My Partner Isn't Getting Wet



Despite putting in the time, oral sex is not causing his partner to become lubricated. What to do?



Every woman is different, and artificial lubrication works well.
Lack of lubrication

Ask the Sexpert

Partner is not getting wet

Dear Dr. Kat,

I have performed cunnilingus twice on my girlfriend, each time for the better part of an hour.  I am new at this but seem to be enjoying it.  My girlfriend is 22 and tells me she is a virgin.  I don't think my girlfriend is getting wet in the slightest bit.  I have only had a few partners before and it has been my experience that after 5 to 10 minutes of regular foreplay the vagina is thoroughly lubricated.  I am looking for a little direction.  Thanks.

Dear Reader,

It's wonderful that you are taking such time giving your partner oral sex. But there may be a couple of issues going on here. Oral sex can be really helpful in helping women to warm up and get lubricated -- but every woman is different. It may be that she doesn't respond as well to oral sex as she would some other type of foreplay. Or it could be that she needs to have more varied foreplay within the hour that you would give oral sex.

It also may be that she just doesn't lubricate much. In this case, to make sex more comfortable for her you might want to introduce a good lube into the relationship. But I'm wondering if she has ever old you she doesn't think she's lubricating enough. Perhaps she might think everything is great. So, regardless, you both need to be talking to one another about what is and isn't working sexually. The sooner you establish permission in the relationship to discuss sex the better. It's a good standard to set.

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