Using a Sex Toy Leads to Better Sex

Male Masturbators to the Rescue

 

Porn leads to masturbation! 

Wait...this is not a new or even mildly surprising revelation.  But a new sexological trend has emerged, which not only finds this statement to be true, but to blame for many ills of the modern day sexual relationship. 

Specifically, the belief is that porn is making men less interested in real life partners and less likely to have pleasure from a 'real' woman -- ending up in a porn addiction.

This conclusion unloads a hefty weight onto porn. While porn carries many social beliefs, it is essentially, just pictures of people having sex.  My personal belief is that porn is like money, or candy.  They are all inherently neutral. It is only how we use them that makes them helpful and delicious, or evil-devil stuff.

Porn can be the pleasurable indulgence that helps us get horny enough to orgasm when we feel stressed out or unable to reach the crest to orgasm.  Or, porn can be used to excess, leaving spouses (and vaginas) feeling inadequate and abandoned.

This trend started with a belief that men are less interested in sex with their real life partners if they use too much porn to get off.  The reasoning behind it is that porn is said to result in masturbation with the hand. Since the hand is tighter than the vagina and will give a more individualized feeling, then too much 'hand' means a less satisfying 'vagina'. The penis, in essence, becomes desensitized to the vagina, thus downgrading the feel of the real thing. 

With this reasoning, the issue has little to do with porn and more about method of masturbation. (* to be distinguished from a porn addiction, which is a whole other matter to be discussed at another time)

Many a sensual and sensitive men may not know that getting into this hand-habit may be preventing pleasurable and satisying sexual contact with their present and future partnes. 

So, what is the solution? Here are a few simple (and pleasurable) fixes:

  1. Use a Masturbator, instead of your hand (like the Fleshlight)
Find a realistic masturbator, that is similar in feel to a vagina, to masturbate with when you are watching porn. Here are some suggestions:

Fleshlight Lady:
Keep it simple, with a not-too-tight model of a Fleshlight Sleeve. The Fleshlight Lady is the basic model with no fancy nubs or ridges inside. The Fleshlight is great because it has a hard casing on the outside that you cannot squeeze to give you 'artificial' pressure.  This is the one most like a real vagina. 

2. Watch (and masturbate) WITH your partner.
If you are both too tired or stressed for couple's sex and you still want/need the release of orgasm, but not the overhead of sex, try other things. You don't have to have intercourse or even touch each other. Comment on what you like and don't like. Have fun with it, together.